Parenting with ADHD: What to Know and Why it is Important

This article will go into some detail about the difficulties of parenting with ADHD and some steps you can take to overcome those difficulties.

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, or ADHD, is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects a person’s ability to stay attentive, sit still, and/or practice self-control. It can be diagnosed at a young age as kids with ADHD can display symptoms like inattentiveness, difficulty listening and following instructions, restlessness, having trouble sitting still, especially for meals or schoolwork, inability to wait their turn, and more.

ADHD is usually diagnosed in childhood and lasts into adulthood. There are also some cases wherein people are only diagnosed with ADHD as adults. This can be due to a lack of education about the disorder or that some symptoms may have been simply overlooked as a child. Here are some examples of adult ADHD symptoms:

• difficulty concentrating or paying attention
• zoning out or daydreaming
• inability to complete tasks or pay attention to details
• poor listening skills
• poor planning skills
• forgetfulness and easily losing things
• quickly growing bored of routine tasks
• impatient
• reckless and hot-tempered

While adult ADHD symptoms are more subtle than those of a child’s, they can still make life challenging not only as a working professional but more so as a parent.

6 IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW AS A PARENT WITH ADHD

UNDERGOING AN ASSESSMENT IS THE FIRST STEP

To make sure you are getting the right help for yourself and your family, it is essential to undergo the right tests for assessing ADHD. If you are diagnosed with ADHD, it’s best to also have your child undergo the test as well, as there is strong evidence that ADHD can be passed on from parent to child. It’s important to get the right assessment since this is the most basic information you need to manage your symptoms and make parenting less of a struggle.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? Putting a name to what you’re experiencing can help you manage it better.

GET THE RIGHT TREATMENT

Taking on ADHD does not stop at getting the diagnosis and figuring things out on your own. For parents with ADHD, it’s important to see a specialist to get the right treatment or approach. ADHD cannot be cured, but it can be managed using various methods such as medication, psychotherapy, behavior therapy, or a combination of these. Some even try biohacking wellness solutions or alternative treatments. Whatever treatment you decide on getting, make sure that you’re consulting with a specialist to ensure your well-being and that of your family’s, because, remember the effects of your treatment will help you manage your symptoms not only as an individual but as a parent of a child.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? Managing your own diagnosis means you can help your child manage theirs as well, from keeping track of their medication, creating and following routines, and more.

FIND TOOLS TO HELP YOU MANAGE THE HOUSEHOLD

You can try different methods for staying on track of your appointments and duties. It can be a manual calendar that you can regularly update or an app on your phone with notifications to remind you of your schedule, from doctor’s appointments to meal prepping to taking medications. For your child’s behavior management, you can explore rewards charts where you can add a star for good behavior and remove one for unacceptable behavior. For this type of behavior management approach to work, you must align the ground rules to make sure that there’s a common understanding of what constitutes both good and unacceptable behavior.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? Creating structure in your household will help you and your child accomplish your daily responsibilities, while behavior management can teach your child good behavior in an engaging way.

READ: 19 Funny Parenting Quotes that will make you feel seen

BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF WHEN PARENTING WITH ADHD

As much as it is rewarding, parenting is challenging too. You may feel like you’re lacking as a parent when you have ADHD, but you should be able to recognize that you are putting in the work: getting the treatment you need and that you’re trying your best. You (and everyone else) can’t always get things right the first time, and there may be some bumps along the way, but that’s parenting with or without ADHD. It’s about continuous learning and improvement. So, it’s important to recognize your own efforts in getting better and healthier for yourself and for your whole family.

And when you do get frustrated or lose your temper while parenting with ADHD, remember: you can learn from the situation and do better. You can take the time and space you need to slow down and manage your emotions. Once you’ve handled that, you can communicate with your child to show that you take responsibility for your actions and apologize. Allow your child to process and talk about how you made them feel. Together, you can communicate openly and honestly about things that you can try to do differently to avoid the same scenario.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? If you want to raise a child who is kind and patient, you must also be kind and patient with yourself. Modeling such behavior is a good example to follow for your child.

READ: Why is parenting harder nowadays? The 5 Top Reasons

DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP

When you add managing your own ADHD diagnosis to worrying about your child’s safety, education, and overall well-being, it can be overwhelming. And there’s no shame at all in asking for the help you need. In fact, it can be a good option both for working and stay-at-home parenting with ADHD. Asking for help can come in various forms; it can be asking your family to babysit while you get your treatment or finding the right daycare for your child while you’re out working or running errands.

There are also online support groups that hold seminars and workshops for parents with ADHD. You can easily search for a support group within your community through social media platforms like Facebook. Sometimes it may seem like it, but you are not alone in this process.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? It takes a village to raise a child is an old saying, but it is still true. Asking for help from your community or hiring the right childcare can truly be helpful for the whole family. And everyone needs a break sometimes—not just parents with ADHD.

MAKE TIME FOR SELF-CARE

RELATED: How to have an amazing self care day (with kids around!)

This is something most people tend to overlook when they start raising a family. But to have the energy to raise your children, you should take care of yourself. It’s more than a once in a blue moon spa day. You should take care of yourself and your health every day. The most basic way to do so is to get enough sleep. It may be easier said than done with an active ADHD mind, but here are top tips for better sleep:

• Set an alarm for bedtime so you can try and get to bed at the same time every night.
• Avoid looking at screens (TV, mobile phones, etc.) at least one hour before bedtime.
• Keep your room dark and quiet for a more restful sleeping environment.
• Increase daytime physical activities for better sleep at night.
• Consider seeing a sleep consultant or therapist for both adults and kids.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT? When you feel your best, you’re better equipped to take care of others.

For most parents, their life’s greatest joy is seeing their kids grow up healthy and happy. And while it may seem that parenting with ADHD can make this vision harder to achieve, that is simply not true. You just need to educate yourself, put in the effort, and try your best. The most important thing to remember is that you’re doing this out of love, not only for your child, but for yourself as well.

Guest blogger bio

Myrtle is a journalism major, a social media marketer and is now exploring freelance writing. She’s fond of anything related to health and wellness, and when she’s not writing, you’ll find her doing long-distance cycling, ultra-marathons, hiking, or in a local cafe enjoying a good cold brew.